Hold me closer
by AlwaysPadfoot
Summary: Sirius Black wakes up in a strange place one morning in the summer after his second year. Things are about to change radically because apparently he slept for twenty years last night. AU.
**AN:** _For Round Three of the QLFC. In this round we had to incorporate the word: Magpie/s, which can be found underlined in this story. I was allocated to word count_ 2251 - 2500.

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 **Hold me closer**

 **AlwaysPadfoot**

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 _ **I was dying, but suddenly had a second chance at living.**_

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 **Scurdie End, Montrose, Scotland**

 **August 8th 1993**

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I came to with the biggest headache, but I didn't want to open my eyes. I still had just over a week left in this hellhole before I spent the rest of the holidays with James. I was going to spend as much of these last days either in my room or outside the house.

Regulus had barely spoken to me. He'd spent all of his summer going to all his Slytherin friends' houses. I'd been stuck on my own because James was on holiday; same with Peter and Remus. We never went on holiday as a family so summer so far had been a living hell. I missed Hogwarts, and I missed my friends.

I frowned slight;y. I could hear the wireless playing downstairs. No one ever played the wireless in our house, well, Reg did, but he was at Mulciber's for a few days so I knew it wasn't him.

I opened my eyes to a ceiling that wasn't my own and sat bolt upright in shock.

This was not my room. This room was small; the single bed pressed up against the wall. The ceiling was slanted on one side and the decoration modest, no Gryffindor colours in every corner. The chest of draws was tall and almost hid the slightly ajar door. The floor was carpeted unlike the wooden floor of my bedroom. The window was pushed slightly open and when I knelt up to look outside, my heart racing, I could see the sea. Gone were the white victorian townhouses that usually surrounded my home; there was the blue sky replacing the usual London grey, soft sea breeze blowing in through the window and tickling my face.

My thoughts turned to my wand, which was not on the bedside where I would keep in at home, in fact it was nowhere in sight.

I threw the sheets back and swung my legs over the side of the bed. I glanced at my reflection in the mirror. Theses were not even my clothes. I was wearing faded grey pyjama bottoms and a light blue t-shirt. Where was the Montrose Magpies shirt I slept in usually? Where the hell was I?

I searched for my wand in the drawers and in the small bathroom off the bedroom, but I couldn't find one single thing that belonged to me.

I pushed the main door wide and it opened onto a wooden staircase, lit by two circle windows as I crept down it. The door at the bottom was just a few inches open and I waited, listening as the wireless played through the house. I could smell food too, but it didn't seem like anyone was on the landing on the other side of the door. I pushed it open gently and it creaked, making me wince. Nobody came upstairs at the sound

I moved slowly along the landing towards what I suspected was the main staircase. There was a picture of a family - parents and two young girls - I didn't recognise playing on the beach at the top of the stairs. Whose home was this?

I peered over the banister, but no one was in sight. I could hear someone moving around in the kitchen though. No one had hurt me yet so I ventured down the stairs and moved towards the open kitchen door. It was there that I stopped dead, confused by who was there when I peered through. I pushed my hair back and then gave a half-hearted knock.

Professor McGonagall jumped where she was standing with a glass of water by the window.

"Mr Black you're up." she said, an actual smile on her face. "I went to the Burrow and he was there. Pettigrew was there. You weren't lying."

"Professor," I said quickly, unsure what she was talking about, and why she was talking about Peter. "Why am I in your house?"

She opened her mouth and then stared at me. It felt like her eyes looking right into my soul.

"You just called me Professor," she said slowly.

"You told James and me off in May for calling you Minnie," I said with a short laugh despite how confused I was.

McGonagall put down her cup and moved closer to me. "Sirius, what's the last thing you remember doing?"

"Um, I remember eating dinner last night, writing to James to complain about my mother and getting into bed." I told her. "I don't remember moving to a different house though."

Professor McGonagall stepped back, covering her mouth with her hands and suddenly something stirred deep in my stomach. Something really bad must have happened at home. Why else would I be in McGonagall's house? Why else would I have none of my things here either? She looked like she had no idea what to say.

"Sirius, you've been in bed sick for five days," she began.

"Professor," I said suddenly interrupting her. "That doesn't explain what's going on. Why am I here in your house?"

McGonagall sighed. "I think it's best to see if a Healer can retrieve your memories before I explain what is happening. And this is not my house. It's my youngest brothers."

I wanted to know what was happening now, not later. It only just occurred to me that Professor McGonagall seemed older.

"How quickly can you get a healer here Professor?" I asked, my voice wobbling.

"Give me five minutes," she replied. "We're going to sort this out okay, Mr Black."

I managed to nod, afraid that if I spoke my voice might crack. I was pretty sure McGonagall could see the inner turmoil because she instructed me to sit down, poured me a glass of water, and then rushed into the living area. She knelt in front of the fireplace, threw Floo powder into in and suck her head inside. I could feel the panic rising inside of me, as much as my family and I didn't get on, I would never wish them injured or dead. I didn't touch the water and the time seemed to pass lit a blur of time because the next thing I knew McGonagall was stood in front of me with Madam Pomfrey.

"Madam Pomfrey has been looking after you for the last few days, Sirius." she explained. "You'll understand soon enough why I couldn't take you to the hospital."

"Alright." I answered with a nod, my voice quiet.

"Okay, Mr Black," Pomfrey said. "Could you just jump up and sit on the table so you're at my height?"

"Yeah, okay." I shrugged.

"Right. I'm going to have to have a look inside your mind, to try and unlock the memories that are missing." Pomfrey explained. "It's not going to be particularly comfortable."

I found my bravest face. "I'll be fine."

Madam Pomfrey placed her wand at my temple and I felt a niggling feeling as my headache grew stronger. I squeezed my eyes closed, quiet as Pomfrey did her examination. I didn't want to see either her's or McGonagall's face in case it was bad news. They were both quiet, all I could hear was a humming in my ears, probably an effect of the spell Pomfrey was casting to check my memories.

Then it stopped. I heard Pomfrey sigh and I slowly opened an eye. I could already tell it wasn't good news.

"They're all gone," she said. "Whatever magic he did, whatever memories he had five days ago, they're gone."

"What does that mean?" I asked, my eyes wide.

McGonagall paused in thought, Pomfrey and I watching her.

"It means," she said. "It means, Sirius, that you and I need to have a long discussion."

She told me to go shower and get changed into the clothes in the top draw. When I protested, McGonagall insisted that she would not delay our chat any further after that, she just wanted me to be comfortable when we talked. The wait made me nervous and I felt quite sick when I got back downstairs. The scones that had been in the oven were now out on the top, cooling and filling the house with a glorious smell which made my mouth water. McGonagall caught me longingly staring at them and made me take one.

Apparently I hadn't eaten for days so it was actually highly satisfying to eat something.

"Okay," I said, taking a deep breath. "I'm going to have a breakdown if you don't explain soon Professor."

McGonagall sat opposite at me at the kitchen table and waved her hand to add marmalade to the scone she'd chosen.

"Whilst you were upstairs, I considered a thousand ways to explain to you what is going on, but I decided the best way would be just to tell you outright the main bit of your situation." she said.

I nodded.

"It's 1993." McGonagall told me, her face set in one of her serious expressions. "Six days ago thirty-three-year-old Sirius Black broke out of Azkaban Prison using very powerful ritual magic. Five days ago thirteen-year-old Sirius was found five minutes down the road by the lighthouse. You told me a whole manner of things, important things, and this morning all those memories are gone. The magic that regressed your age caught up and now it's as if you got up in the summer of your second year."

I think my whole body stopped. It wasn't that I didn't believe her, it was that I couldn't believe her.

"I would never go to Azkaban," I managed to whisper. "What about my parents? My brother? Where are they now?"

The look on McGonagall's face told me that her response could not be any better. "You brother and father both passed before the end of the war, your mother a couple of years afterwards."

My body went cold.

"All of them?" I croaked. "My brother?"

A sob broke free from my throat, my shoulders hunched forward. McGonagall stood up and knelt down beside me, holding my arms.

"I'm sorry, Sirius," she said. "I really am. I can't tell you how horrible I feel for you to be in this situation."

I leant forward, my forehead on her shoulder. I was shaking. I slid down on my knees, slumping against her, big gross sobs racking through me. I forgot that she was my Professor; right now she was just the only person around. She didn't seem to care much that I was her student either because she put her arms around me and just held on whilst I cried. God. I hadn't cried like this in years; I wanted to go back. I didn't care how much I complained about being at home, I just wanted to be in my room in my house with my brother across the corridor and my mum in the conservatory downstairs.

I didn't know how much time passed, but McGonagall didn't complain once.

"Professor, what did I tell you?" I asked quietly. "What did I break out of Azkaban for?"

I sat back and noticed that her eyes were wet too. Slowly she explained about the war, which I suspected she toned back substantially. She told me that Voldemort was after James' son, that they went into hiding. That Peter was their secret keeper in a complex charm that hid them and he betrayed them, but everyone thought it was it was me.

"I would never betray James; he's my best friend." I told her. "Peter wouldn't; he wouldn't…"

She held onto my hands. "No one knew that you weren't their secret keeper Sirius and Peter did. Perhaps he was scared, perhaps not…"

Then she told me how Peter turned to murder to escape; how I was blamed for what he did; how the war was so bad that anyone suspected of helping Voldemort was sent to Azkaban without a trial. I spent twelve years there before escaping and then they found Peter hiding as an Animagus, apparently we all were one, to help Remus. He'd escaped from the Aurors four days ago.

"This is so much," I said. "Too much."

"I understand. If you would prefer to talk about it in a few days, give yourself time to take everything in," McGonagall suggested.

"I think I need some time, I don't know." I said, everything inside me was looking for guidance. Whenever I needed words of wisdom I used go to Andromeda. "What do you think I should do Professor?"

"I think you some take some time to clear your head." she replied. "If you have any questions you can ask me, if you need anything, ask me and then when you're ready we'll decide where we go from here."

I nodded. "Am I allowed to leave the house?"

McGonagall appeared to think about it.

"I'd prefer if you didn't today, you've been very sick and I'm concerned about your health," she explained. "You may go in the garden, but don't go through the back gate. Just for today."

I needed air.

"Thanks, Professor. Sorry I cried all over you," I said, feeling my cheeks turn pink.

"Don't apologise, Sirius. Not for that."

I wanted to offer her a weak smile to let her know I appreciated it, but I couldn't so I just nodded and moved towards the back door.

"And it's not Professor," she called out behind me. "This is different. Minerva is fine."


End file.
